ABOUT MATTHEW FRENER
Integrative Counselling & Psychotherapy in London & Online
I'm Matthew Frener (he/him), an Integrative Psychotherapist and Dialectical Behaviour Therapist working from Fitzrovia, Central London, and online. I work with adults seeking to understand themselves more deeply, whether that's exploring anxiety, trauma, addiction, identity, relationships, or the patterns that quietly shape how we move through the world. My practice is rooted in compassion and a commitment to anti-oppressive care, with space for all of who you are and everything that brings you here.
Matthew Frener
INTEGRATIVE PSYCHOTHERAPIST
he / him
THE NATURE OF CHANGE
Relational psychotherapy London
My approach is shaped by a set of core beliefs about what it means to be human, and what makes change possible.
I believe the self is formed in relationship, that distress often reflects disruptions to how we learned to connect, regulate, and make sense of ourselves and others.
The ways we learned to cope were intelligent adaptations. The difficulty is that they were built for an earlier relational environment, and do not always translate well to the present one.
"The patterns we bring into adult relationships are rarely arbitrary. They are the residue of earlier relational experience, shaped by what felt safe, necessary, or survivable at the time."
This is where the therapeutic relationship becomes central.
HOW I WORK
The therapeutic relationship matters
At the heart of my practice is the therapeutic relationship; a connection built on trust, understanding, and mutual respect. How we are together in the room matters as much as the content of what we discuss.
Research consistently shows that the quality of the therapeutic relationship is one of the strongest predictors of positive outcomes in therapy. This reflects something more fundamental: our capacity for meaningful connection with others is central to emotional wellbeing. In relational work, the therapeutic relationship is not just a nice backdrop: it is the primary medium through which change occurs.
Some people come to therapy knowing only that something feels stuck, or painful, or that life isn't quite working, without yet having words for why. Others may arrive with self-awareness: they can name their patterns, trace them back, explain what tends to go wrong.
And yet the same dynamics return.
In both cases, the patterns that shape how we relate to others tend to live in the body, in expectation, in the automatic ways we respond when closeness or conflict is near, often beneath the reach of conscious understanding.
Rather than simply talking about what happens outside the room, the therapeutic relationship itself becomes a place where those patterns can be seen, explored, and over time, worked through and loosened. We'll work holistically, attending to all aspects of your experience: cognitive, emotional, somatic, relational, and where relevant, spiritual.
CORE VALUES
What guides my practice
I see therapy as a space to meet the full complexity of who you are. Emotional suffering does not arise in isolation, and neither does healing. We are shaped by our relationships, histories, bodies, identities, and the wider contexts we live within. My work is guided by four core values that shape how I practise.
01
Relationship
I believe that much of our pain is shaped in relationship, and that relationship is also where healing becomes possible. Therapy offers a space where patterns can be explored not only through what is spoken about, but also through what is felt and experienced between us, in the texture of how we meet each other. The therapeutic relationship can become a place of honesty, repair, and new experience.
02
Compassion
I believe people make sense in context. Rather than reducing struggle to symptoms, flaws, or labels, I aim to approach each person with curiosity, care, and respect for what they have lived through. In my experience, shame often softens when it is met with genuine compassion rather than judgement. That shift can make space for complexity, and support a kinder relationship with yourself.
03
Justice
I value a way of working that is culturally aware, anti-oppressive, and attentive to the wider forces that shape our inner lives. Our difficulties do not exist outside the worlds we live in. Therapy should make space for the impact of identity, power, marginalisation, and social context, rather than treating distress as a purely private matter.
04
Authenticity
I value realness in therapy. For me, this means bringing myself into the work, rather than retreating behind a role or technique, and meeting you with presence, honesty, and care. Authenticity is not about saying everything, but about working in a way that feels genuine, grounded, and human.
05
Wholeness
I believe people cannot be neatly divided into a mind to be analysed and a body to be managed. Feelings, thoughts, sensations, and experience are always interconnected. In my work, I try to remain curious about the whole person, not only what you think and say, but what you carry in your body and what your nervous system holds from all you've been through. Therapy is not only a talking space, but one where bodily experience is welcomed as part of the conversation.
MY APPROACH
Relational Integrative Counselling & Psychotherapy
Rather than working from a single, fixed model, I tailor my methods to your specific needs, experiences, history, and what you need right now, drawing on a range of approaches and integrating multiple modalities. I firmly believe that therapy should adapt to you, not the other way around, as there is, after all, no "one size fits all" solution.
My work is trauma-informed, meaning I approach every person with an understanding that difficult experiences, whether a single event or a lifetime of relational pain, can shape how we think, feel, and move through the world. Therapy here is never about pushing through or moving too fast. Safety, pacing, and your sense of agency are central to everything we do together.
The approaches I draw on are built on the following Relational, Attachment and Developmental Neuroscience-informed foundation:
THE FOUNDATION: Relational, Attachment & Developmental Neuroscience-Informed
At the heart of my work is the understanding that relationships are not fixed, but co-created. The patterns we find ourselves in are shaped by our early attachment experiences, which also influence how our brain and nervous system develop over time.
From a developmental neuroscience perspective, our capacity to regulate emotions, feel safe, and connect with others is formed through relationships. When these experiences have been difficult or inconsistent, it can leave us feeling stuck in patterns that no longer serve us.
In therapy, we pay attention not only to your relationships outside the room, but also to what happens between us. By exploring these patterns as they emerge in real time, we create the conditions for new relational experiences, supporting greater emotional regulation, a deeper sense of safety, and more fulfilling connections with yourself and others.
From this relational foundation, I may draw on a range of other approaches, frameworks, and techniques, always in service of what feels most relevant and useful for you.
Humanistic & Person-Centred Therapy
Underlying all of my work is a commitment to a genuine, collaborative relationship. I aim to offer a space where you feel heard, understood, and accepted without judgment.
I trust in your capacity for growth, and we move at a pace that feels right for you. Therapy becomes something we create together, shaped by your needs, your experiences, and what feels most important for you to explore.
Somatic & Body-Based Approaches
Trauma and stress are not only held in the mind, they live in the body too. Sensations like tension, numbness, restlessness, or a persistent sense of unease are often the body's way of holding experiences that words alone cannot fully reach.
By gently bringing attention to physical sensations, drawing on mindfulness as a way of noticing without judgment, we can begin to understand how the body has been shaped by experience. This is a slow, paced process, where we work together to build a sense of safety and grounding, allowing your nervous system to settle and supporting a deeper connection between mind and body.
Psychodynamic
Together, we explore how past experiences, often outside of conscious awareness, continue to shape your thoughts, feelings, and relationships. For many people, this includes experiences that were painful, confusing, or overwhelming, and that have left their mark in ways that aren't always easy to name.
Rather than uncovering a single "truth," this is a collaborative process of making meaning, where we begin to understand how your internal world has been formed. By bringing these patterns into awareness, you have more choice in how you respond in the present, opening up the possibility for change.
Parts Work (Internal Family Systems-informed)
At times, it can feel as though different parts of you are in conflict, pulling you in different directions. Rather than trying to get rid of these parts, we approach them with curiosity and compassion, understanding how each has developed in response to your experiences, including those that were painful or difficult to make sense of at the time.
Together, we build a relationship with these parts, helping you feel less overwhelmed and more integrated, so that different aspects of you can coexist with greater ease.
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) & Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT)
We look at the connection between your thoughts, emotions, physical sensations, and behaviours, and how certain patterns may be keeping you stuck. CBT helps us identify and gently challenge unhelpful thinking patterns, while DBT offers practical skills to manage intense emotions, tolerate distress, and improve relationships.
Mindfulness is woven throughout this work, not as a separate practice, but as a way of bringing gentle, non-judgmental awareness to what's happening in the moment. This can help you notice patterns earlier, create a little more space before reacting, and relate to your inner experience with greater compassion.
This is a collaborative process, where we work together to develop tools that feel relevant and usable in your daily life. The aim is not to "fix" you, but to support you in responding to challenges with greater awareness, flexibility, and control.
ANTI-OPPRESSIVE PRACTICE
Working with the whole person in context
Distress does not exist in a vacuum.
The experiences people bring to therapy are shaped not only by personal history but by the social, cultural, and structural conditions of their lives, by racism, sexism, homophobia, transphobia, classism, ableism, and the many ways systemic inequality shapes what feels possible, safe, or permitted.
My commitment to anti-oppressive practice means I work to hold both dimensions simultaneously. I attend to the individual in front of me and to the wider context that has shaped them. This shifts the question from what is wrong with you to what conditions made this response necessary, a reframe that I believe is not only more accurate but also more humane.
In practice, this means recognising how identity, culture, and social location inform your experience; understanding how oppression and trauma intersect, shaping emotions, relationships, and coping mechanisms; being mindful of the power dynamics present in the therapeutic relationship itself; and working in a way that seeks to empower rather than pathologise.
I also hold the theoretical traditions I draw on with the same critical awareness. The frameworks that inform this work are predominantly Western and reflect particular cultural assumptions. I treat them as partial and situated contributions rather than universal truths.
Therapy should be a space where all of who you are is welcome, including the parts that have been marginalised, misunderstood, or unseen.
WORK
Clinical Experience
Integrative Psychotherapist
Private Practice
2021-ongoing
I have maintained a private practice in Fitzrovia, Central London, and online since 2021, working with adults across a wide range of presentations. This is where my integrative, relational approach is most fully expressed, working at a pace that suits you, with space for the depth and complexity that meaningful therapeutic work requires.
Dialectical Behaviour Therapist
Priory North London
2025
I worked as an individual therapist at Priory North London, one of the UK's most recognised mental health providers, within their DBT programme. I worked individually with adults whose experiences often involved trauma, identity, emotional regulation, and the patterns that can make everyday life feel overwhelming.
Addiction & Eating Disorder Therapist
Start2Stop
2021-2024
I began my clinical career at Start2Stop, one of London's leading residential rehabilitation centres, working with adults recovering from addiction, eating disorders, and compulsive behaviours. I worked one-to-one, facilitated groups, and supported families through the recovery process.
EDUCATION
Qualifications and training
Level 6 Clinical Diploma in Integrative Psychotherapeutic Counselling | Metanoia Institute |
MSc Integrative Psychotherapy (in progress, expected 2026) | Metanoia Institute |
BPS Approved Dialectical Behaviour Therapy Full Practitioner | Greenwood Mentors |
BPS Approved Master Practitioner in Eating Disorders and Obesity Management | National Centre for Eating Disorders |
Somatic Trauma Therapy | Babette Rothschild |
Certificate in Couples Counselling | National Counselling Training Institute |
BACKGROUND
Before the Consulting Room & Beyond
I’ve always been drawn to human stories: what drives people, what shapes them, and what they carry and rarely say aloud. That fascination led me first to acting, then to producing, where I completed an MA in Creative Producing at the Royal Central School of Speech and Drama. I was drawn to work that created space for voices that didn’t always have it, and to stories from communities that were underrepresented, marginalised, or simply not being listened to. That was the work that mattered most to me.
Therapy was, in many ways, the next step in the same direction. I came to it out of necessity while navigating my own significant challenges, the kind that reshaped my life. What I found in that room surprised me: it was not the therapist’s framework or technique that made a difference, but the relationship itself: being met, consistently and without condition, by another person who didn’t flinch. There is something I can only describe as being loved back to life. This first-hand experience of asking for support and being genuinely met when I did is why I believe the client-therapist relationship is where real change happens.
I decided to undertake a Master of Science training programme in Integrative Psychotherapy at Metanoia Institute, validated by Middlesex University and accredited by UKCP (U.K. Council for Psychotherapy). The MSc was five years in total and required weekly personal therapy throughout. Rightly so. I can't ask someone to go to difficult places with me if I haven't been willing to go there myself. The course was rigorous: academically, clinically, and personally demanding in ways I hadn't fully anticipated. I'm glad it was; it’s made me the therapist I am today.
My commitment to this work has continued long after my training. I still attend weekly personal therapy and have weekly clinical supervision; not as obligations, but as the foundation of practising with integrity and staying genuinely present for the people I work with.